Physical therapy ends

Yesterday was my final trip with my physical therapist. I've been doing PT since April. It was kind of biter sweet and sad yesterday. I was sad when I left as I still know I have a ways to go. I wish I felt 100%. I am still having muscle spasms in my left hip area and I wish I was not let go to deal with it on my own. But we had come to a point where I need to work on this myself everyday with what he has taught me. Even yesterday when he worked on my hip I feel pain and spasms. But if we look at the overall picture when I limped into his office months ago, I am better, much better. I no longer have constant pain in that area, I can cut and reach my left toes now. It's still a hard stretch but I can do it now. I still do not have a chance at painting my left toes, that stretch is to hard and I can not do it. I have to go have my toes painted by the beauty college if I want them pretty. My physical therapist yesterday told me he hated to tell me this, but he does not believe I will ever be perfect or pain free from these muscles. For years and years I limped and manipulated my limitations and after 20 + years I ended up with tight hurt hip muscles. So the only way to look at this is to remember how I felt a year and a half ago, rather than wish and think about what I can or can't do. A year and a 1/2 ago I was working in a video store and when I left that store from 8 hour day I would crawl home from being on my feet all day. I cried from the pain, drug myself from my car to my house. The first 20 steps in the morning were so so painful on my ankle and hip. I needed my husband to be my chiropractor and pop my hip back into place to even feel like I could walk. Just writing and thinking about all this makes me cry and shake as I feel so thankful not to be living like that anymore. Now I just have a nagging pain in my left hip and an occasional muscle spasm. I don't cry anymore over it from the pain. So YES I want to feel 100%, I wish I could run, jump but that is not the facts. I have to work with what I have. I did not get into this mess in just a few months. This injury to the muscles is from years and years. I have to keep stretching and moving those muscles in ways they haven't been moved in years, and keep swimming. I'm going back to the pool tomorrow for the first time in awhile. Even though it's over I came along way. The weight loss will allow me to move and become stronger. I thank god for what you have shown and given me. I was sometimes sad, hurting on the outside and going down a destructive path with my future if I stayed 300+. I was scared for my future and how I would feel in 10 more years. I know my pain and the extra weight would of just led me down even deeper as I aged. When you don't want to move or can't move you just get heavier as the years go by.

I am thankful!

I'm still working on making me a BETTER ME.